Monday, September 20, 2010

.FOOrD BLOrG. Snackies.

Confucius says a lot of confusing things that are attempted to define and appropriated within peoples living experience. So apparently Komforte Chockolates, hailing from California, have decided to take that approached to chocolates. I will keep this short today so here is the break down:

1- Appears to be a med. to light dark chocolate. Upon breaking it into pieces you can see a little white from ramen noodles.

2- It tastes like chocolate. Duh right? Sadly though that is all it tastes like. Now there were three of us ( Sarah, Kristin, and I) taking this test and we all agreed. Just chocolate.

3- Yep, just chocolate.

4- After taste of chocolate.

Let down by the breakdown? Well welcome to how we felt. Don't get me wrong we all agreed it was good chocolate perhaps even great but lets face it. It is called 'RAMEN NOODLE CHOCOLATE' which could have really been something. Think about that dark saucy fluid that you can make with the ramen powder and the depth of those notes with their high sodium content. That sort of thing could really be playful with the flavor complexities of chocolate but no. Apparently I had read to much into the idea and not the label. This is literally a chocolate with a tiny amount of ramen noodle. The noodle didn't provide even a textural play it was just there. Was this a let down? For me yes, it was safe. Is there a market? I am guessing that this is perfect for Californians who like they risks with a giggle. 'Oh aren't we daft? We have college kid sustenance in our high end chocolates! Gafa!'. Well, that is how I imagine it.....

.FOOrD BLOrG. dark drinkie.

I have seen this particular beverage in the adult consumption isle of a few specialty shops but never purchased it due to its hefty price. Running between 4 and 5 dollars this dark horse was always a bit of a risky choice when the description only defines the title. But this shopping experience, largely due to the helpful support of my wife " never buy yourself anything'. Yes my wife thinks I deserve DAMNATION.

Judging from the bottle and the ;able and the cork I had deduced that this drinkie would most likely be dark and ale-like. So upon opening this bevy I prepared myself for a hefty wallop of brutal beer force.

1- Not really a scent to speak of upon uncorking.

2- First gulp was a revelation as there were no soy sauce notes that I was so ready for. Seriously my mouth expected it so much I was trying to imagine them there but they weren't.

3- Second gulp was even better than the first! This beer has a smooth finish and a well rounded flavor profile but not heavy in any way.

4- Gulp. Gulp. Gulp. Oh my, am I finished all ready?

Well in recap, this beer was pretty much a work of drinkable art. Now I know that sounds serious coming from me but DAMNATION really blind sided me. I expected problems and over masculin-hamfisted beer brewing but I was ever so wrong. DAMNATION has dethroned my previous industrial-goth-black metal beverage WARSTEINER. Yes I said it, now go buy yourself one and have yourself some Burzum and beer.

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

.FOOrD BLOrG. More Drinkies!!!

Someone recently asked me why I was blogging about food instead of posting my doodles or what have you. My answer is simple, I have been sampling the world wares of the snack kingdoms for awhile now and they all have a common denominator. That being every snack promises an experience. That is the hook and the bait for consumers to choose that particular snack over another. While one chip might promise that it will remind you of a baseball game where the bases are loaded nacho situation. Another chip will promise that you will think you are eating a loaded baked potato. There is your choice and please choose wisely. So for me, this experiment is less a report on odd snacks around the world and more about what they deliver in the realm of the promise of experience. See, everyone has different tastes but something that makes three different people want to vomit is an experience. Confused? In short, this is an experiment. Well lets get to it:

Ah yes, Ginger Beer is nothing new nor is Ginger Root Beer and there are several facsimiles of both. This particular ginger beer hails from Japan which has become my favorite snack and beverage destination. As I said earlier everyones tastes differ so you are really in the hands of the brew masters and their taste pallet with beers. Here is the breakdown:

1- Upon opening it smelled of an upscale beer. No real pronounced ginger notes to speak of which can be a good sign if you plan on drinking the whole bottle.

2-The flavor was that of an amber with a touch of a more dark beer with an earthy lash of ginger toward the finish.

3- Three of us tried this beverage and while Sarah did not care for it Kristin didn't seem to mind it nor did I. Step three in a nut shell, I finished the bottle.

4- Success, As a Ginger Beer it went down fine with no backfires or heartburn. Overall a fine drinking experience. Not to mention the cute owl on the label.
Ok remember when I was talking about three people wanting to vomit? I wasn't talking about the ginger beer. I was referring to TWO RIVERS Huckleberry cider.
I saw this and thought what a local delight this could be?!? Wow, was I wrong. So wrong that it is honestly hard for me to look at the bottle even.

1-It smelled like a sponge.

2-It tasted not like cider and not like Huckleberry.

3-Oh, that is what it tastes like-SPONGE. Yep sponge water from an old sponge that has been rung out by someone who doesn't wash their hands in the potty closet. Ok, maybe that is a tad too far but seriously all three of us were grossed out. To give credit it was Sarah who figured what the taste was and once she did we all couldn't drink it.

4- FAIL. I couldn't finish this experience instead it finished me. I stopped the experiment just passed the neck of the bottle.

In closure I would like to add that Sarah and I have noticed that our pallets do not prefer some wheat beers. When we go to steinhauses we notice that if it is a wheat and somewhat cloudy that our mouths interpret that taste as 'SPONGE WATER'. So perhaps this drink is great for people with those pallets and not for ours. All I know is for us those 'two rivers' to which the label refers could only mean for us two rivers of yerp springing from our throats. MMMMM taa taa ! Till next time.

Monday, September 13, 2010

.FOOrD BLOrG. Mexico!!! I am looking at you!

If you are one of the three people who look at this exercise in snackdom than you already know that I have little to no faith in Mexico's snack kingdom. But let me stress this point, I am still trying their goods (mostly bads thus far) because they dererve the benefit of the doubt. So here we have 'Salaghetti' which if you are like me then you made this in college with Taco Bell hot sauce packets and cheap pasta. This product however is, of course, Mango flavored gummy noodles with a packet of chili sauce for drizzling. Yep, I have been putting this off for over a month now and busted it out since we had a friend Kristen over and she was down for the sampler platter so this was the debut that evening. Well one of two but the rest will be in a separate post. Here we go:

1. Typical gummy scent with a dry almost dirty accent with a hint of pee. (All three of us came to that conclusion.)

2. The initial flavor of mango is nice. (This first taste was without the drizzle.)

3. We added some drizzle and here is the breakdown:

K- Tastes like barf and salivation.

S-My mouth is watering like I need to puke.

D- You are both correct.

4. Now 4 is usually reserved for the second trial of a snack and usually is the saturation point of the pungent snacks. That was so true here and I regretted every second of it. The nausea quality to this product is pretty sickening and sticks with you luckily we had a second item to try but again that is for next time.

Step 4 bled into 5 which is usually the aftermath. None of us wanted much more aftermath than we had survived so once we had braved the 'Salsaghetti' we were ready to forget it. Much like the other shame foods of college years when looking back at this snacksperience I think I can speak for all three of us when I say 'Let us never speak of this again.' Oh and Mexico you better get with the program or you'll be out in the cold like Finland.

P.s. Check out that partying Duck!! Why is there a duck in Mexico anyway? I have never seen a duck in Mexico. I bet they only have them in zoos.

Friday, September 3, 2010

.FOOrD BLOrG. Calling for backup Moufs.

Alright, so I needed back up and Sarah was game so one night I made a sampler plater. Well the next night Dave and Rosa came by so I made another sampler plater for them and here is how it broke down:In order to save time Sarah will be represented by S, David by D, and Rosa by R.
S-Liked it. Functionable to erase bad tastes. (see next snack) Not good chewing gum.
D-Tastes like pinesol and ginger. Flavor dissapates quickly.
R- Tastes of chlorine. I like it but it tastes like chlorine.
S- Compressed arlic salt and one drop of blood.
D-Pee, chicken boulion and salt.
R-salt and chicken.
S-Tastes like Jaeger.
D-Tastes like amaretto.
R-Agreed. Ameretto Jaeger.
S- Like licking a dusty leather boot.
D-Bad pulled pork
R-Frittos and beef

Yup, these here are essentially cheetos but Tom Yum soup flavor.

dirk-They smell of lemon grass and taste of lemongrass. Doesn't taste like the soup but they are spicy and taste also of lime. I ate quite a few.
S-Tastes like lemongrass and they are spicy...give you fish breath. Or seaweed.
D-Breath smells like fish, of the sea.
R-delicious, spicy, loved it.
That concludes our sampler platter experiment. All of these have there own blog post with the exception of the tom yum fritto chips. I'd like to take this moment to thank my contributers for their valiant efforts and brave tounges.